Jeff:  I hoped to make it to your special Satsang tonight, but can't. I know that you practiced at Mt. baldy in your earlier years before taking the \"Vedantan turn.\" I have spent a lot of my adult life in various Buddhist retreats, and have been working with Advaita teachers/teachings for a few years now. I'm considering going back to Mt Baldy or more likely to Providence Zen Center to do long retreat, because I love koan practice. Can you tell me a bit about your move between koan practice and advaita?

Umi: Once you become a seeker there are always two choices.  Either gather more information, learn new techniques, become more knowledgeable or surrender the 'me', surrender that which you believe is you and be willing to move into transformation.  At this stage you are doing the first, but this too was how I started.  While on this path, I always felt deep down, there was something missing, none of the practices touched the very core.  I too loved the koan practice, but still it was a practice. 

I came to realize that I needed to confront head on that which was covering, that which was preventing.  I needed a Living Enlightened One, one who understood the western mind, who understood the cunning and intricate ways of this mind.  I realized that the Zen practice was created for a nine hundred year old Japanese mind.  I needed an Awaken Master who understood the western mind.  And I never moved into Advaita.  Because when you work with an Awaken One, there is no form, no system, it is always about coming face to face with your own creations, your own illusions.  Only with this direct work can the transformation occur.  But the disciple has to be willing, open, available and ready.

Since the Awakening I neither practice or teach Zen nor Advaita.  All that is here is simply coming directly from this experience, this knowing, and working directly with those who are ready.  And as each person is unique, they each bring with them a unique set of stratgergies to maintain their 'me', their ego, Therefore the work can never have a particular system.  This work is about being close to a Master and allowing the vibe to enter in.  Allowing the inner silence of the Master to enter into your own being.

Love
Umi